Hey guys. Sorry about being M.I.A. the last few days.
I’ve been talking to my “boyfriend” “the Janitor” “Eric”. All these people are the same person. Sorry I keep calling him something different. We’ve been trying to deal with what’s going on between us, but it has been hard. Especially when he doesn’t make it a first priority. He did however come over last night, we were supposed to talk, but we haven’t seen each other in a while so we enjoyed each others company instead. We started The Walking Dead where we left off. We got all cuddled up and watched zombies eat some brains. He had a cold so I propped him up on some pillows to breathe better. I had a hard time sleeping last night. I was happy, but I had a lot of noise going on beside me and my mind was racing. Bad nightmares, sweating, awake every hour.
This morning I woke up early for work but even earlier to make us breakfast. Not only did it take him forever to wake up, I tickled his feet, massaged his back, kissed his face and body, ran my hands through his hair. Nothing. So I yelled at him to wake up. (I may have over exaggerated on the yelling bit). Then he comes upstairs to me making breakfast and he doesn’t want it. Fuck sakes. So I took both breakfasts with me to work, I refuse to eat his just because. He picked up and went outside for a smoke while I’m still cleaning up and grabbing my work things.
I finally went to sit with him and he said he wished we had talked last night then he attempted to say a few things, but didn’t really say anything. We were both in a bad mood and I had to get on my way to work. No hug, no kiss, nothing. Just a talk to you later. Jesus Christ, this kid. I swear to God. If I get charged for murder, you all know why.
I just want us to be happy, is that too hard to ask? I’ve been trying, why can’t he see that? What can I do to make this easier? Seriously though, any advice would be grand. I really like this guy and this is very frustrating and upsetting.
I don’t think he noticed my newly dyed hair or my repierced naval… Unless he just didn’t say anything.
Anyway, back to work… doing nothing.